And any time you feel the pain, hey, Jude, refrain
Don't carry the world upon your shoulders
Well don't you know that its a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder
Anche went swimming today as I finished my History Test. Three essay, 2.5 hours. My DABS was about Mao Zedong's rise to power. My other two essays were about the social and economic causes of WWII (German Nationalism, World Depression, English appeasement) and the other was about Stalin's successes and failures as a ruler of a single-party state. I had trouble coming up with very many successes. But that's okay. I had lots of raisins sprinkled in my oatmeal, as Mrs. Gardner would say. =) So Angie went swimming while I finished my history test. Jill coached her, and told her that she was going to coach 15-18s at Meadows. That makes me happy- we'll have a coach that will take care of us. And I should be happy, I know, Jill is hilarious and good at swimming and smart. And I know her, so they're won't be any weird swimmer/coach relations. Yet I kinda hoped that Jinger was going to surprise us the first day of practice- that she wanted to trick us and then surprise us that she actually did come. But, no, all the meadows coaches are new. I thought that maybe, well, Mark didn't "know" who the coaches were, Jill didn't "know" what age group she was teaching, Mrs. Cady did know that swimming was starting soon- maybe they were all in a mass conspiracy against Angie and I. But no. And I knew that wasn't really the case. So why am I so disappointed when the impossible isn't true? When I see a green Jeep Cherokee, or a giant blue SUV with a flag bumper sticker, I think that maybe Jesse and Jenny only moved across town- that our parents planned this big ordeal just to make our lives a little difficult. My life is pretty perfect, actually, except for my best friends moving all the time. But of course the Nichols don't live in Gunbarrel or in North Boulder- they live in Chapel Hill. They do have a house- it isn't just a house they rent to trick us that it is actually their house. So, I ask again, although I know all this couldn't possibly happen in a million years, that Jinger wouldn't take all that trouble to hide her coaching from us, that OF COURSE the Nichols live in North Carolina, that Em and Julia ARE moving to the other sides of the country, why do I secretly dream and hope that they aren't? And why, even though my logical brain tells me it's impossible, do I still cling to hope? I'm just set up for disappointment in all directions.
And I am happy that Jill is coaching. Meadows starts next week!
