God only knows all the places I've been but I love this life that I'm live'n in and I won't look back to regret yesterday. We're not handed tomorrow so I'll live for today.
I just recently returned from Arizona, where I was visiting my grandparents with my family and my best friend, Jesse. There was no getting drunk, wasted, or trashed, but I thoroughly enjoyed myself. Grandma kept us quite busy, but there was still time for laughing ourselves silly on the pool deck and staying up late whispering secrets. Jess lives 2,000 miles away, in Chapel Hill, North Carolina, so I don't see her very often. But it's certainly wonderful to have a best friend. I was getting fried here in Boulder, but Jesse is always the cure for angst. I think I did her good, too. That girl stresses too much. Anyway, we did lots of amazingly fun things, besides goof off, which was probably the funnest. (yes, I know that's not a word.)
We arrived Saturday afternoon; me, Angie, Mom and Dad, that is. That day we just sat around, readjusting to our new environment and strumming the guitar my dad had sent to AZ- it was very cool.
Sunday the six of us went to Cirque del Soleil, which was amazing! Half way through I was thinking I should join the circus for a year, but by the time I got out of the air- conditioned (!!) tent, I had re-thought that idea. But it was very cool. We saw the show called Corteo-- about a dead clown. No one really followed the plot, but all the stunts were very impressive.
Sunday night I sat on my grandparents patio (which faces a golf hole with a lovely lake) and wrote a letter to Sarah. It was fabulously warm with just a slight breeze and the birds chirped, and the fountain in the water trap splashed ever so gently- it was so beautiful. I wished I could have stayed their forever. However...
Jesse arrived on Monday! Hooray for that. Angie and I picked her up from the Phoenix airport and just laughed the whole way home over things that weren't all that funny. We knew they weren't funny, too, but sometimes the best thing to do when you're so happy is to laugh.
Grandpa took us to the horse races after that, and the three of us worked together to lose $15 dollars. It was sad. We didn't win one cent. Of course it was fun. And we weren't supposed to bet, anyway, you had to be 21, but as long as we had money, they didn't seem to mind. =)
We also went on two hikes, one climbing a Arizona-mountain (which aren't quite as large as Colorado mountains)and one so-called desert hike, that was fun but not-quite-as.
Lots of pool-playing and getting tan. At least I think I'm tan- I haven't really compared my skin tone to anyone else's yet
I ate so much ice cream, it was delicious
We went to a Andy Warhol exhibit yesterday. That was very strange. Warhol was really a lucky cultural phenomenon-- I don't know if I liked his art so much.
Baseball game- Cubs vs. Diamondbacks at Hohokam field. Cubs won- they had two homeruns in the first inning, but slowed down from there. It was fun, though I only watch baseball when my grandparents by me a ticket to a spring training game. People watching was the msot fun, I think. Below are some random people I took pictures of- only three random pictures, actually. Cute little boy, fireman on bicycle and matching mother-daughter fans wearing gear from a team who weren't playing. Then there's Jesse, Angie and I, and some baseball players.
Overall, it was a great trip. School doesn't start for four more days. Hooray!
Will you let me romanticize, The beauty in our London Skies, You know the sunlight always shines, Behind the clouds of London Skies
Only one more day until Spring Break. And it's desperately needed, I think. Absolutely- people are going insane, I think. But they'll enjoy a break. I'm certainly going to enjoy a break- go to arizona, hang out by the pool with my best friend, fish golf balls out of the pond, horseback riding through the desert perhaps. It'll be fun. But still, we've got to get through one more day.
Whenever I hear Jamie Cullum I'm going to think of Sarah. Things always take on a different connotation, though. Like the word "moist" I think of Emily Weigel, "genetics" and I think of the one-eyed, one-horned, flying purple people eater, and when you mention the OEOHFPPE, I think of Mrs. Cady WHO I saw today. It was a very nice suprise- I was walking Bilbao, and there she was riding her bike. She saw me first, and stopped and talked for a while. It was very enjoyable. If more people were like Mrs. Cady, the world would be a better place. She's funny, and smart, and athletic and kind, and she's a great teacher, and probably a great mother. Again, do other people look up to adults like I do? The unfortunate thing is that I am an adult- 18 years old and legal. No more having sex with freshman, snap!
Yahoo! Music has a very nice set up- I'm quite enjoying the launchcast radio. I have to take a break from my iPod as it devestated me for accidently stopping my award-winning shuffle. But right now, I'm listening to Chieli Minucci. I have no idea who that is. None. But he plays guitar nicely. See? Yahoo is broadening my music horizon. that's just swell.
Carey bought a robot at Savers today for 95 cents. It's a pretty awesome robot- I'm quite the fan. It's name is "Kaplonga RX", and Carey was completely smitten with it. It was quite amusing. I do wonder how long Kaplonga will be in favor, though, for Carey is like those English kings- she's constantly changing her opinion of everything. Were English kings like that? Carey isn't, really, but Kaplonga may end up decomposing in her locker along with her 10 pairs of shoes.
On and on the rain will fall Like tears from a star, like tears from a star On and on the rain will say How fragile we are, how fragile we are
I've decided, after reading my friends MySpace profile (which I still don't have, thank goodness. I'm quite content with this lovely blog) I've decided that I want to die heroically. Not necessarily tragically or young, but I hope to be heroic. So maybe someone will rememeber me. Better to be remembered for my death than not at all, I guess.
Transport, motorways and tramlines, starting and then stopping, taking off and landing, the emptiest of feelings, disappointed people, clinging on to bottles, and when it comes it's so, so, disappointing.
Every once in a while I need to be reminded that I am only as happy as I make myself be. And I do know that, quite well, actually, I just need to realize it. Slap myself when I'm in a bad mood and say "Kristen, get a hold on yourself. You're not upset/mad/angry/disapointed/annoyed. Sing a song, figure it out and smile." That happened today. For no apparent reason, besides everyone in the entire school is fading fast, I was depressed and despairing, and all of a sudden I switch. I thought to myself- what's the point of this heaviness? Smile and the world smiles with you.
In biochemistry we learned about DNA replication and played with pipe cleaners. After doing the simulation, I made two beautiful bracelets, one red and yellow, one pink and green. They're a fashion statement- I like it. Laurel and I also assigned everyone in the class to roles in our mideval kingdom. I forget what I was, though I'm sure it was clever. Sarah was the lute player, Lauren- the jester, Meili and Angela were croquet players, Matanya and Matt were mud wrestlers. We're amazing. Lauren drew beautiful graphics to go with our list. I'll have to steal the sheet and scan in it to save if for eternity. =) it was quite enjoyable.
I talked to Sarah (Erickson, not Judkins. That Sarah was the lute player, and was also sick, but I didn't talk to her last night) for ~60 minutes (the ~ means approximately, for you non-science/math folk) last night. We didn't talk about anything. I did read her Jennifer's Rabbit, though, she had never read it before. It wasn't a very good reading, I must say, but I think she liked it. Nothing like a classic kids book to make people feel better. Sarah was sick, you see, so I had to call and make her feel better. The best way to impress a friend is to call them when they're sick, if you ask me. Granted, they already have to like you, because if you called someone who didn't like you (or even if they were just indifferent), then that would be considered awkward. BUT if you're already friends, it's a quite nice thing to do.
Oh, bad news about the iPod shuffle world-record. I was only at 97 when I accidently reclicked "shuffle" and it started ALL over agin at song #1. I was crushed. I guess it wasn't meant to be.
"The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes of mind. " - William James.
Hey you, out there in the cold Getting lonely, getting old Can you feel me? Hey you, standing in the aisles With itchy feet and fading smiles Can you feel me?
I was really hoping for a snow day today. They were predicting 8-12 inches, and that would have gotten us a snow day. However, we only had about 3, so of course we had school. KBCO plays on my alarm at 6:09 in the morning (hit snooze and I wake up at 6:18, can lie in bed for 2 minutes, and I'm usually downstairs by 6:30) and I listened through all the commercials (KBCO plays way too many commercials) to see if school was cancelled. But no, the list of cancellations went from Aurora to Cherry Creek, skipping Boulder Valley altogether. Bummer. And it's not snowing now, so the chance of one tomorrow is slim. Freshman year, we had three snow days right before break. It was amazing.
We're interviewing the newspaper staff to come up with positions for next year. Sam, Phoebe and Grace all went today- some combination of the three will make up the editorial board for next year. They'll all be great, I think. It was kinda fun, though, to be on the other side of the table. I remember being so scared last year of that interview. But they all did a good job today.
I'm seeing Jesse in one week! Isn't that exciting! Yes, yes it is. AND I've had my iPod on the same shuffle rotation for 79 songs. The most I've ever done is 112 songs, and then I plugged it into my computer, so the shuffle was ruined. But this has been a good rotation so far- lots of good songs I don't play very often. That Pink Floyd song was on the radio, though, I don't have it. A lot of the lyrics I use are from the radio rather then my personal collection. oh! Song #80 is If I Only Had a Heart from Wizard of Oz
VI The snow in it's dance of twistingturningwindingweaving always made her dizzy vertigo spinningandspiralling away from sense and sensibility into the darkness she knew lingered just below her toes. So far, though there was always something at hand to grab an iced metal pole a banister a stranger so she didn't plummet into the infinitlyexpandingpast
She said, "I wanna learn a love song full of happy things." She said, "I wanna learn a love song; won't you let me hear you sing?" She said, "I wanna learn a love song, I wanna hear you play." She said, "I wanna learn a love song before you go away."
I just got back from Estes Park- we were there on a field trip for my science class. All the second-level classes went, Biology, physics, and chemistry. It twas a bundle of fun. Nearly all of my friends were up there (except for the non-seniors and the choirs kids. They had a concert and rehearsal they couldn't miss) and it was fun. Frustrating, yes, as well as cold, disorganized, and many people were about to burst a blood vessel, but now that I'm home and comfortable, I say it was fun. =) We did a lab about the water in the area, although the two lakes were frozen solid and the creeks were mostly frozen. And none of our data was conclusive. But that seems to happen a lot to me, so I'm used to. Inconclusive labs are just as entertaining as ones that teach me something. That's not true, actually, I'd much rather have conclusive data. But, you know, we make due. So, that's what were that's at
It was snowing in Estes today. Angie was wearing a skirt in Boulder today. Seems kinda crazy, if you ask me. However, I was several thousand feet higher than she. That might explain it.
V Glistening fingertips painted red just that afternoon caught the rays of the single bulb. they danced or raced like thieves through crowded Moroccan marketplaces across the keys that weren't the classic and cliched white ivory keys. and indeed, there was a chip in her fingernail polish.
But you don't need my pictures on your wall You say you need no one And you don't need my secret midnight call I guess you need no one Is anybody waiting at home for you Cause it's time that will tell if it's heaven if it's hell or if it's Anybody waiting at home for you Cause it's time that will tell this tale
Yesterday was the Winter Sports Banquet, and although we already had our banquet, Hally and I went to say a few words about the swim team to the parents of the wrestlers, basketball players, and cheerleaders (who's defining season moment was they didn't "have as much drama this year". I swear- it's a direct quote.) So, all was well and good except Hally and I thought it was at 1:00 when, in reality it was at 2:00. Rats! But never fear, for the school was open, so we went to the senior balcony to watch TV. But, as one might have expected, at 1:00 on a Sunday, there is nothing good on TV. Nada. So we sat on those gross sofas for a few minutes, quite bored already with whatever infomercial was currently playing.
It was Hally's idea, really, to clean up Carey and Genny's locker. It didn't seem random then, but as I forget what conversation the plan came up in, it's quite random now. It wasn't very hard to open their locker, as the bottom half couldn't possibly close. It was just a matter of shaking it up and down a bit. And once we started, we couldn't have stopped- just shove everything back in. They would have noticed that, too, I think, and been much more suspicious. So we cleaned their locker. It only took twenty minutes, tops, but it was quite the adventure. I threw away all the newspaper they were suppose to deliver for community circulation. We stacked their binders and books (and I found the West Wing tape I had given Carey last semester) We folded their clothes (consisting of jeans, several shirts, dirty socks, and a nice jacket) and very un-neatly piled their shoes in. They probably had 10 pairs of shoes in that locker of theirs. Who has 10 pairs of shoes in their locker? I'm sure those hardley ever came out- most were crammed in the bottom section where things had starting composting. =) It wasn't actually so terrible. We taped up the wrapping paper they had on the inside door, and put the Spiderman valentine Carey had made Genny on the door, too. (it's funny, because as she was making that valentine, Carey said that LAST year, Genny had just thrown her slaved-over valentine in the bottom of their locker. Deja vu?) I didn't tell them that it was us- even when they asked (though I was suprised I was on their suspect list. And Genny said "I don't think anyone likes us enough to do that for us" to which I almost blew my cover. But managed not to) But I'm terrible at keeping secrets, and when other people asked me if I did it, when I didn't have the excuse to go to class, I had to tell. Besides, the dofus grin on my face probably gave me away.
Hally found me after 7th and whispered in my ear "It didn't last long- that locker is a mess!" Which made me laugh. Of course it was. They're too _____ to be tidy. Which I like.
IV she's the most beautiful girl in the world or so they say and when the flourcent lights play across her temple and she laughs at the reflextion in the glass the universe is brighter and the sun grows and inflates and we're all covered in magnificent light
Every time I look at you, I go blind. Every time I look at you, I go blind. In the mornin' I get up, and I try to Feel alive, but I can't. Every time I look at you, I go blind.
So, here's a new layout. It's back to msimplerer format, which I do like. Those buttercups were starting to get annoying. =) The words in the masthead are lyrics to the songs "Stars and the Moon", "Shall We Dance?", "I Won't Grow Up", "Shiny Happy People", and "Drops of Jupiter". Not a bad collection if I do say so myself.
This weekend my family did a three-dimensional puzzle of the Vatican. It's pretty great, I'm quite pleased with our success.
But since I've wasted my weekend doing puzzles and redesigning my blog, I now have to go chop up my World Lit papers (they're too long, you see). Wish me luck.
Last car ride: 1 hour ago- coming home from the boys' swim meet Last good cry: Real cry? After watching Crash two weeks ago. Last library book checked out: I checked out "Cards on the Table" by Agatha Christie today. Last movie seen: Walk the Line Last book read: "Cards on the Table" or "Pride and Prejudice" by Jane Austen. I'm doing a dual-British novel thing Last beverage drank: Milk Last food consumed: Chicken and Rice and red peppers and peas. Last phone call: Pete (aka Santa Claus) Last TV show watched: American Idol- ohhh dear. Not really a fan of that show. Last time showered: Yesterday Last shoes worn: I'm still wearing my trusty tennis shoes Last cd played: Guys, it's the age of the iPod. I've had my entire library on shuffle for the last 3 days. Last annoyance: Annoyance? Probably Allie and Hally's incessant screeches during lunch. I hate screaming girls. Last disappointment: how uninteresting my life is Last soda drank: Haven't drunk soda recently but maybe it was a Hanson's manderine-lime. Last sleep: I woke up this morning at 6:30 Last person seen: My sister is upstairs with the rest of my family. I've seen them all very recently Last ice cream eaten: Thin Mint ice cream. It's pretty delicious Last time hugged: Today, after Sarah did her monolouge for me. Really I hugged her, does that count? Last underwear worn: Well, I'm wearing black now, but before that was my lime underwear Last shirt worn: FHS swimming--red writing on black, still wearing that, too. Last time dancing: I don't really know, actually. I'm sure I've danced recently, but "been" dancing- not for a while. Last poster looked at: Winter Choir Concert Advertisement, perhaps? Last web page visited: Previous entry that I copied this from.
I'd shine my light through cool Colorado rain. I know you, rider, gonna miss me when I'm gone; I know you, rider, gonna miss me when I'm gone; Gonna miss your baby, from rolling in your arms.
JESSE IS COMING FOR SPRING BREAK! Thank goodness. I thought I was going to snap. But Jesse's coming to the rescue! Hip-hip-hooray! That puts in a much better mood. Thank goodness for best friends. Nothin' like 'em, you know? Except for sisters- they're an awful lot like best friends, too. Mine is, really.
We didn't have to go to school today until noon because of CSAP testing. (woot!) Twas great. I sat around all morning doing nothing. It was great. And Sarah and I were planning on going on a hike tomorrow morning in our free-time but it might get really cold, in which case we should just eat breakfast. I am enjoying this spring-like weather, though. I went on a (very) short bike ride after school today. It was enjoyable, though the wind had picked up by then and it was dropping in degrees. Nothing like the sound of bike tires on pavement, though.
JESSE IS COMING!
Thanks to Russ's and Margo's short poetry lessons, I'm going to start writing more poems. They're neat.
II Bending paperclips is so easy with just a tiny force you've changed the useful, symmetrical, art into a piece of metal and then what have I got?
he didn't like choosing favorite colors numbers animals classes picking favorites never ended well but he did because when his girlfriend asked him (she need to pick a shirt) he paused she threw a fit and he had to ask himself is she my favorite?
The bravest thing I've ever done Was to run away and hide But not this time, not this time And the weakest thing I've ever done Was to stay right by your side
People don't pay enough attention to other people. Not at all. Most everyone is nice, and friendly and very worthy of being a friend, they just get so caught up in life they don't have time to say "hello" or ask you how you are, or if they do ask you that- all they want is a classic conversation: Hi! How are you? Good, you? Good, thanks Why does no one talk more than that. I want to talk to someone. Really talk. Lame surface stuff sucks. But what would we talk about? The Oscars? (which were great, by the way) Pops? Swimming? Nothing that matters. Maybe that's why I'm so afraid of leaving- I don't know enough about people yet. High schoolers never talk to eachother about anything of significance. Maybe it's just me. But really, I don't have anyone who I think would listen. Really truly listen. They'd be really nice about it, I think, but they would take the new information and do anything with it. And I don't even know what I would say. Maybe I should just blame my moods on hormones. That's what we're learning in biology.
Seriously, though, why do I write day after day in this blog? For me, I would like to think, so that when I'm old I can look back and re-live my high school years. Or at least get a glimpse. And because I like recording things. It's not subconsciously for other people, is it, so they can understand me? Because I don't write enough for anyone to know me. I write frivolous stuff, which is fine by me. It's not supposed to be entertaining or meaningful. All I want is for someone to care. And there are so many wonderful friends, and it's not that they're not good friends, I just want to touch someone. "I think we miss that touch so much, that we crash into each other, just so we can feel something." Good movie, Crash is. Won Best Film last night- hooray.
Plastic stars glow-in-the-dark on the ceiling when she tosses in her sleep and the moon shines upon her glistening face Curtains, that should have been lowered to block the blinding morning sun, stay open and let the moon peer in on her dreams Of poetry and flocks of geese
I met a man without a dollar to his name Who had no traits of any value but his smile I met a man who had no yearn or claim to fame Who was content to let life pass him for a while And I was sure that all I ever wanted Was a life like the movie stars led And he kissed me right here, and he said,
"I'll give you stars and the moon and a soul to guide you And a promise I'll never go I'll give you hope to bring out all the life inside you And the strength that will help you grow. I'll give you truth and a future that's twenty times better Than any Hollywood plot." And I thought, "You know, I'd rather have a yacht."
Oh Pops! How I do love you. I did end up going again last night, and it was very good I did, because I enjoyed it just as much, and now I have come to slightly better terms with it being the last one. I was slightly embarrassed to talk to my friends in Pops, though, and show them that I was such a dork. Luckily, only Ellen made fun of me, and she doe that a lot anyway. And Ellen wasn't even in it- she just was in the audience. And through a strange series of events, I got fabulous seats right in the middle section and got to sit next to Megan and Vivian and Margo. And this song- "Stars and the Moon" was sung by Sarah (who I really like- it's a bummer that we really only became friends this year) and Kyra (who I've known since 2nd or 3rd grade- it's a bummer we didn't stay friends) and Audrey (who I don't know- but I probably should). Now, I could find this song and buy it off iTunes or something of the sort, but I really like how they sung it best. So maybe they recorded it? Do they record Pops? I think so...
I met a man who lived his life out on the road Who left a wife and kids in Portland on a whim I met a man whose fire and passion always showed Who asked if I could spare a week to ride with him But I was sure that all I ever wanted Was a life that was scripted and planned And he said, "But you don't understand —
"I'll give you stars and the moon and the open highway And a river beneath your feet I'll give you day full of dreams if you travel my way And a summer you can't repeat. I'll give you nights full of passion and days of adventure, No strings, just warm summer rain." And I thought, "You know, I'd rather have champagne."
I met a man who had a fortune in the bank Who had retired at age thirty, set for life. I met a man and didn't know which stars to thank, And then he asked one day if I would be his wife. And I looked up, and all I could think of Was the life I had dreamt I would live And I said to him, "What will you give?"
"I'll give you cars and a townhouse in Turtle Bay And a fur and a diamond ring And we'll be married in Spain on my yacht today And we'll honeymoon in Beijing. And you'll meet stars at the parties I throw at my villas In Nice and Paris in June."
And I thought, "Okay." And I took a breath And I got my yacht And the years went by And it never changed And it never grew And I never dreamed And I woke one day And I looked around And I thought, "My God... I'll never have the moon."
Take a shower, shine your shoes You got no time to lose You are young men you must be living Go now you are forgiven
I am desperately in love with the entire choir department. Seriously. I think, tonight, I would die for each and every one of them. Aye! Why must so many marvelous people walk past me every day without me knowing them? I swear- Genny Patterson is going to be famous. Mackenzie may be wary of her aspirations, but damn! that girl can sing. As, by the way, can Peter, who was diagnosed with mono only a week ago. He sang "The General" as quoted above. It was one of my favorite performances.
Did I mention I went to Pops tonight? It was amazing. Fan-flippin-tastic. I couldn't get over it. Of course, it ended about 50 minutes ago, so I haven't been obsessing for very long. But I'm very tempted to go again tomorrow night, but I feel that a) I wouldn't have as good of seats and b) I wouldn't have any company and c) that would kinda creep all my musically-oriented friends out. Of course, I've already made them a little worried, I think, by attending as many choir performances as physically possible. BUT KUDOS TO EVERYONE. I loved it. There were one or two acts I could have lived without, but they just made the others so much better. And "Walking in Memphis"? Oh Mr. Mungo you are truly talented. Bummer that "Border Song" was cancelled, team, I was really looking forward to that.
HOWEVER, Excal was amazing, as usual, as were Six Guys Named Blake and I got a kick out of the individual acts, as always. And this is my last Pops ever. Ever. Because it won't be near as good once I don't know every single person in it, and I'm moving to California, it's not likely I'll come back to see Pops. So that was sad. Very much so, actually. And Rose's song made me cry (just a little!) already, and then halfway through the 2nd Act I felt like I got hit by a truck. It's a year of lasts, as Katherine said, which is making me slightly miserable.
